Don’t Say
Music and Lyrics: Noelle Pico
don’t say you don’t have anything left to give
don’t say there’s nothing more to share
don’t say the leap of faith’s too hard
just say, yes, i’m scared, i’m scared
don’t say you don’t have anything left to give
don’t say there’s nothing more to share
don’t say the leap of faith’s too hard
just say, yes, i’m scared, i’m scared
sit down, let me tell you a story,
it’s in a city somewhere out there:
maybe yours, maybe mine
it’s where the sunshine doesn’t reach
enough to trace the way to go
and no one tries or asks, you know?
it’s in a footstep or a brush or maybe hiding in a hush
it’s the one that goes back to the heart of all hearts
it’s in a smile, all silent sound, and maybe we will come around
because it’s the story that doesn’t need words just like these
don’t say you don’t have anything left to give
don’t say there’s nothing more to share
don’t say the leap of faith’s too hard
just say, yes, i’m scared, i’m scared
don’t say you don’t have anything left to give
don’t say there’s nothing more to share
don’t say the leap of faith’s too hard
just say, yes, i’m scared, i’m scared
bottle emotion up in wine bottles, store them twenty years or so
surface tears will go with dinner tonight, but at least we know they go
fix up soup and maybe dessert, set down forks and spoons and knives
lay it all down like the pieces falling into place tonight
don’t say because there is so much here to give
don’t say because there is so much more to share
don’t say because the leap of faith is hard, hard, hard
don’t say because i know: you’re scared, you’re scared
speak up and know that it’s your voice
speak up nevermind about the noise
speak up because even if you drown, drown, drown
speak up the rest will always be around
don’t say don’t say don’t say
——-
Sometimes, the music comes first. Sometimes, it’s the words. Sometimes, it flows out of me so easily that the moment I step off the train, I end up spending the next hour polishing it in my head, my mouthing uttering the words as I walk through the city streets with the night surrounding me.
And sometimes, like with this particular song, I find that the melody stands just out of reach. When the metaphorical fingers of my mind strain to reach it, it steps back and away, vanishing like some half-remembered dream.
I wrote this song some two years ago. It’s an unfinished piece that I keep hoping I’ll be able to put down to the keys sooner rather than later, and so far, it seems to prefer later. A part of me reasons out that perhaps, it’s not done yet because the feelings expressed in the song are something I haven’t completely worked through and come to terms with. The other part is stubborn, and is working hard at locating that melody, because I want it enough to exhaust all measures to find it.
I had a dream once, about a year ago, that I finally got the arrangement down. It was one of those rare times when it felt like an out-of-body experience to wake up, sobbing like I’d missed something so precious. I spent the next two hours watching the dark outside, and when the sun started to color the sky, I lay back down and went back to sleep, quietly hoping that I could maybe trace my steps back into dreaming.
I can hear snatches of what it sounds like it my head. And when I dance my fingers over the keys, I try to remember.
It’ll come ‘round eventually, I’m sure.
chasing kites
